If you’ve ever wondered what surprises a home inspector after crawling through attics in places like Nashua, Manchester, Bedford, Amherst, Merrimack, and Milford for years… the answer is: apparently, quite a lot.

You’d think after thousands of inspections I’d become numb to the weirdness. Nope. Every week, Southern New Hampshire homeowners continue to find exciting new ways to confuse, concern, and occasionally horrify me.

Here are the three things that still leave me staring blankly into the distance while holding a flashlight…

1. The Number of Homes Without Working Smoke Detectors

This one genuinely amazes me.

For all the smart technology packed into homes across Nashua, Bedford, Manchester, and Merrimack, you’d think smoke detectors would be the one thing people consistently maintain.

Nope.

I regularly find:

• Missing smoke detectors
• Dead batteries
• Smoke alarms disconnected because they were “annoying”
• Units yellowed from age that were probably installed during the Clinton administration
• Smoke detectors hanging by wires like exhausted bats
• Entire finished basements with no smoke alarms at all

And almost every time, somebody says:

“Oh yeah, it chirped, so we unplugged it.”

Perfect. Problem solved.

Nothing says “I value my family’s safety” quite like defeating a life-saving device with a stepladder and mild irritation.

Smoke detectors are one of the cheapest and most important safety devices in any home. Yet somehow people treat them like optional accessories, somewhere between decorative throw pillows and scented candles.

The especially wild part is that many homeowners spend thousands on granite countertops, smart thermostats, and outdoor entertainment spaces… while the smoke alarms quietly sit expired and nonfunctional overhead.

As a home inspector in Southern New Hampshire, I can tell you this:
You do not want your first notification of a fire to come from the family dog looking concerned.

Test your smoke detectors. Replace old units. Change batteries regularly. And if one starts chirping at 2:00 AM, maybe don’t solve the problem by removing it entirely and tossing it into the garage like it betrayed you personally.

2. The Number of People Who Leave Their Windows Unlocked

I’m not talking about “Oops, we forgot one bathroom window upstairs.”

I’m talking:

• First-floor windows unlocked
• Basement windows wide open
• Garage side-entry windows unlocked
• Entire homes apparently protected only by “good vibes”

Often I’ll test a window and accidentally discover I could have moved in three days earlier.

I know Southern New Hampshire towns feel safe. I get it. People in Hollis and Londonderry aren’t exactly preparing for an international jewel thief to rappel down from the roof Mission Impossible-style.

But unlocked windows are one of the easiest ways for burglars, wildlife, and neighborhood teenagers to gain entry.

Honestly, if your home security strategy is:

“Nobody would ever come here…” …that’s less of a strategy and more of a motivational quote.

And before anyone says:

“But I have cameras!” Great. Now you’ll have high-definition footage of someone climbing through your unlocked basement window.

And as a bonus, locked windows are usually more energy efficient too. Many modern windows are designed so the sash pulls tighter against the weatherstripping when locked, helping reduce drafts and air leakage. So when homeowners leave windows unlocked all winter in places like Amherst or Milford, they’re not just making life easier for burglars — they’re also generously donating heated air directly to the outdoors. Somewhere, your furnace is working overtime while a cold breeze sneaks through an unlocked double-hung window that hasn’t been fully latched since 2017.

3. The Number of People Who Just Accept Mice as Roommates

Some homeowners react to mouse evidence with genuine concern.

Others react like I just pointed out a decorative throw pillow.

“Oh yeah, we hear them sometimes.”

Sometimes?

Sir, the attic insulation looks like the mouse version of Las Vegas.

At some point in New Hampshire, many homeowners collectively decided:

“Well, it’s winter. The mice live here now too.”

Listen, one random mouse during a January cold snap? Fine. That happens.

But when:

• there are droppings in the kitchen,
• tunnels through attic insulation,
• chewed wiring,
• nesting materials everywhere,
• and the basement smells like a pet store managed by raccoons…

…we’ve moved beyond “minor issue.”

Mice aren’t harmless little cartoon sidekicks. They chew wiring, contaminate insulation, damage HVAC equipment, and create health concerns. Yet some people discuss active infestations with the emotional urgency of commenting on cloud cover.

I once explained significant mouse activity to a homeowner and they shrugged and said:

“Yeah, they’ve always done that.”

Imagine applying this logic elsewhere.

“The brakes barely work.”
“Yeah, they’ve always done that.”

“The roof leaks every spring.”
“Yeah, it’s kind of its thing.”

4. The Sheer Lack of Home Maintenance

This one truly deserves scientific study.

Some homeowners will spend $80,000 on a new truck while their house quietly decomposes behind them like an abandoned amusement park.

I routinely see:

• Gutters hanging on by one screw and optimism
• Decks rotting into compost
• Furnace filters old enough to vote
• Water stains that clearly predate multiple presidential administrations
• Caulking failures visible from space
• Chimneys auditioning for a collapse documentary

And the best part?

Many of these problems started as cheap, easy repairs years ago.

Home maintenance is like going to the dentist:

• Ignore a tiny issue = manageable repair
• Ignore it for 10 years = financial emotional damage

Especially in New Hampshire, where weather absolutely punishes homes. Snow, ice dams, freezing temperatures, humidity, rain, sun exposure — your house is in a constant cage match with nature.

Homes in towns like Derry, Salem, Windham, and Hudson need regular upkeep. Not because inspectors enjoy ruining weekends, but because deferred maintenance compounds fast.

The scary part is that most maintenance isn’t even complicated:

• Clean gutters
• Replace furnace filters
• Seal openings
• Trim vegetation
• Address leaks early
• Stop pretending the weird noise will “probably go away”

That last one almost never works, by the way.

Final Thoughts From a Slightly Concerned Home Inspector

After years of performing home inspections throughout Southern New Hampshire, I’ve learned that homeowners are incredibly optimistic.

Optimistic that:

• unlocked windows are fine,
• mice are temporary tenants,
• and maintenance is something future-them will handle.

Unfortunately, future-them usually calls me after the damage gets expensive.

The good news? Most of these issues are preventable with a little attention and routine maintenance.

The bad news? Somewhere in New Hampshire right now, a mouse is probably living behind a furnace next to a filter installed during the Obama administration… while the basement windows are unlocked.

And honestly, he’s probably pretty comfortable.